So i reach down under slight under a week ago. I can tell you the place is fantastic. Its everything at the same time. Its hot and its cold. Its green and its blue. Its everything at the same time. But i think saying its easy to be away from home is way different from actually being away from home. In a way Cambodia has given some experience to toughen me up. It was has bad as in way there. But still the homesickness seems to be getting worse with time.  The move is awesome. given a choice I'd still want to be here. But its all so overwhelming. permanently suffocating. I need time to breathe. i just need these loads to be removed. And part of the burden is just the unknown.

Its hard. Its not easy. But now i am just going to take one thing at a time. get completely settled in. The apartment feels like home now.

i just realised i haven taken that many pics yet. ok. Time to start!!!

I'm in the bus now. On my way home from school. This has been the first time ever this year I'm going home alone. Its so funny how we’re so comfortable to something and then when we start a new routine. This routine become like a second skin. So much so that when we slip back into the old routine or even a new one, we feel like we’ve been dropped into a pot of boiling water. Complicated how going home alone gets huh. I wonder if going to Australia will be like getting a second skin or being dropped into a pot of boiling water I think some changes just have to be waited out to be decided the route it takes.

I'm starting to become close to people again. I wonder if that a good thing or a bad thing I know right now some people think its a bad thing because of my terrible time management skills. But I’m hoping it gets better. But am i putting myself up for the hurt like i once i did way back then? Or am i just making sense of life and going with the flow. I know it still hurts when i see my old friends, knowing that they still have their kinship and i don't, it hurts. But this group…It feel different. We’re a little bit more matured and a bit more sensible. But its so freaky when even friendship scares you.

Boy am i super doomed when it comes to relationships? I wonder. I really do.

‘Don't listen to them , its what they know. We need each other to have to hold. They’ll see in time, i know. When destiny calls you, you must be strong. I may not be with you , but you’ve got to hold on.’

I typed that on my way back home yest. nice to have a lappy that can last the short ride home:)

I’m addicted to edge of desire and two is better than one. i love music. da da da-da da da- da da da

‘dont say a word. just come over and lie with me’