Its been a long time since i posted. Haiz. i not feeling too good today. Like so out of sync. Didn't go gym either today. Ive been going for the pass 3 days and i must say it feels good. But its good to have a break also. I think I'm just tired. I feel sad, sleepy and depressed, how bad can this get. Anyway, just had debate. Was the adjudicator along with Luke.

There so much I'm thinking about, and I'm just about ready to give up. I'm too tired for all this. I just cant take it.

Going for Sangamam with Sapnaa. Only god will know how that day turns out.

I miss you. I feel sad and i just want to hear your voice and talk to you and maybe even hear you say you missed me too.

I've got to stop dreaming. I wishing for ideas too far fetched.

phew.Today was bloody tiring. Just a quick update before i hit the sack. Firstly, i must say, I'm quite proud of my self. I woke up at 8,30 and actually hit the gym after a long hiatus from do any form of exercise. Ha ha. I guess that's good. Planning on going everyday of my holiday. Anyway, after that, i went back to school( although it's my holiday) and gave my laptop to the IT help desk and got it re- reformatted cause it died on Saturday. Anyhow , its alive again. While that was being done, me and Naz were designing posters for rumbles (a debate tournament organised by speak IG). It was quite cool. One of it was superhero themed and the other was nature-ish. My fav is the superhero theme. Will put it up asap. Well after that, went and met Gaya came home and then went back to the hospital. I had mac's for dinner. Kind of ironic cause i gym-ed this morning, oh well.

One step at a time.=)

I'm seriously too tired to think too much. Gonna just turn in now. yawns.

By the way, you make my heart beat all too fast again.

ill give a full update about today tommorow.
update about debate and tommorow's gathering also.

The only reason im updatig now, is to just say, i havent lost a friend. Oh my god. I've just missed him so much. And we're talking now.well wjhn i see im anyway. At least i know he doesnt hate me. Omg. It was great talking and craping about all the usual nonsense. Haha.

p.s , My hair does not look like a bird nest. It was neat.

lappy's back.



D drive stil there



everything else gone



photoshop there



but no serial number



AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



[sad face]

My bangle arangement. Credits to Gaya.

And finally me, camwhoring in the toilet of occ when i got bored.

today, well its enterprise. Kinda fun lah. But im sleepy and tired. Can't wait or break sial. I feel SO sian. But anway. Next friday is prefect investitture,but i'm not sure if i wanna go. I'm quite scared, don't ask why. Plus its on my first day of hols. So like i dunno.

I like 6 school days till hols. and i so need a break. I just tired you know. Like so many tings are stressing me and i just wann sit down. I'm always going school or goin to yss or going hosp. i just want a day with no commitments. Yesterday i went home early ad i accuatlly slept in the afternoon for once.

I'm think i need change
Maybe i need to change my hair
or maybe take a dare.
But i think the change i need ,
is a change within,
Maybe just a change of scence.
People around me,
stories we talk ,
The paths we choose to walk.
This is the path i choose. A change.

Well, I'm sitting in a pitch black room where i can't see anything except my laptop screen and the plugs on the table. why? cause my HP charging and I'm too lazy to change the plugs to on the light. The result: sitting in a dark room blogging. Well technically I'm supposed to be studying but nothing is going up my head. I'm just so blank on what I'm reading. So being the genius i am, i deciding to blog a little, or maybe a lot and give studying another shot. Later.

For now I'm just going to blog bout everything i meant to blog about but couldn't find time.Well the past week has been quite hectic. So many things going on.

Let me just start with school. I got an A for science UT. but sadly all my grades are still C's cos i never take one UT. I just hope that my grades increase cause my current GPA is at a very bad position. I can't even get a overall 3.8 eventually unless my GPA improves to 2.8 and i scored prefect 4's for the next 5 semesters.

Well debate, is like OK. Quite fun except feela seems to have totally lost interest for it. I enjoy it. I mean on Sat i went. Topic was fun. " This house supports Gay couples adopting children". Perry and I were opp. It was really fun except that i did not accept any POIs and i started laughing and then choking on laughter. But i DID clock in 7.12 mins which is better that my last record of 4.something mins.

Erm, what else can i talk about. Oh yes. DISTURBIA. That movie is just cool. straight to the point and shia lebu or however you spell his name is just a total cutie eye candish kinda guy. It was a really nice movie and I'd rate it 4 stars. I especially like the way to movie took sudden turns of mood. Like falling into a pit of dead bodies then finding his mom. awww. did i spoilt the movie for anyone? no? damn.

Loving and missing you has become what but a foreign dream.
Today i tell you my dear, i miss you.
Today i tell you my dear, liking you was a mistake.
And today i tell you my dear, I hope i have not lost a great friend.
I love you no more has a lover but has a friend.
I miss you no more has a lover but has a sister.
I miss you no more (or no less) than ever.

I'm praying hard i have not lost a dear friend. Only time can tell

well , ive been like meaning update but like keep lazying...

gonna update soon bout
1)d isturbia
2) school
3) songs
4)debate
5) and me...hehe...

80%How Addicted to Blogging Are You?

wow . i didnt know i was this bad

I was just blog surfing and i found you tube video's of someone in my past. And i just realised how pain full this is. Moving on and not talking to him. Its not the moving on part anymore. I am over him. I don't have feeling for him anymore in that sense. But my feeling o him being a good friend of mine is not over. I miss him as a friend. I miss talking back to him and him calling me lame names. This conversations we had was not about me liking him but about him and me ans friends. And i find it hard and pain full to lose a friend like him. Part of me regret that i told him again that i still had feelings for him cause i lost a friend. But the other part of me has no regrets because if i had not told him, i would not have gotten over him. Getting over him has help me take another breath of fresh air. It finally help my head AND heart agree on my priorities. I've been having nightmares of him. Of him scolding me, Of him leaving me stranded in the middle of a dark alley and so many other nightmares. And when this happens I can barely function throughout the day. It becomes as if my body is on autopilot. It so pain full to walk pass somewhere and remember the friendship I've lost. I wish the friendship with had didn't die. I really hope it didn't die.